One Small Drink For Wizardkind
by four screws loose
Summary: Snape Angst. Snape gets drunk and all hell breaks loose... for him anyways. Is there more to him then there seems? Read and find out.


Disclaimer: I don't own anything Harry Potter related (although I did make up professor Sinastra's first name cuz I have no clue what her real one is). Don't sue me, for I am just a poor, broke, (sometimes pathetic) little Otaku. Actually I don't own very much except for a large (and still growing) collection of manga and anime and a copy of Barry Trotter and the Unauthorized Parody. Yea, I'm that sad. Heck, I don't even own the Harry Potter books yet: they belong to my mother! Anyways, happy readings!!

_Peace Out!_

CHAPTER ONE: "One small drink for man, one giant keg for wizard-kind."

"Severus! That's not what I meant!" he was answered by the harsh sound of the heavy oak door slamming behind the angered Potions Master. He sighed, taking his seat behind the large desk in his office rethinking the conversation he'd had with the younger man; it didn't go too well.

Severus Snape hurried along the narrow corridor, praying to the gods he hadn't prayed to in ages that he wouldn't run into anyone on his way back to his rooms in the Dungeons. How dare that old coot make assumptions about me? How dare he tell me what to do! He thought, furiously.

**SMACK!** In the midst of his rage, he didn't notice the other professor headed in his directions; papers were flying everywhere, scattering all over the hall, sliding across the smooth polished floor, fluttering to their feet. He was so preoccupied with his thoughts that the pain never even registered when he crashed to the floor. "Oof!" **thud!** "Whoa, mate! Are you alright--- Severus? What on earth?"

He looked up blurry-eyed, dazed, wondering what had happened. "Huh?" Was what he heard himself ask dumbly.

"Are you alright?" The graying man reached out his hand to help the fallen Potions master up. He ignored it, struggling to his feet on his own. "Severus?" Concern was etched into the other man's voice, which probably wasn't helping the matter any.

"Fine. I'm fine." He looked away. "Not that it concerns you."

"What kind of talk is that? 'It doesn't concern you'. Ha."

Severus scowled. "Leave me be." With that he turned on his heel and stalked away down the darkened corridor, leaving his "rival" behind, confused and concerned. He needed some time to think. Somewhere quiet other than his gods-forsaken rooms in the school dungeons. Somewhere out side the castle. Cutting through the courtyard, he was quite displeased to see McGonagoll headed in his direction with an armful of parchments, and a rather stern look upon her elderly features. Her determined walk halted no more than a foot from him.

"Severus, where have you been? I've been searching all over for you for the last hour, at least!"

He let out a disgruntled sigh between crooked gritted teeth. "What is it this time, Minerva? And make it brief, I am a very busy man who happens to be going someplace rather important."

"Oh? Pray tell, where might you be headed that's so important? To your dungeons perhaps, to lock yourself away for the night to brood?" When he answered only with a glare, she continued, gesturing to the bundle in her arms. "I need you to sign some very important parchments. I hope you don't mind too much, but Dumbledore needs them by Thursday afternoon."

"Leave it to dear old headmaster to give one of his professors less than two days to sort through a stack of paperwork as big as the Ministry of Magic building itself. Does he intend for me to get arthritis?" He spat, eyeing the papers.

"Come now, don't be so bitter, Severus. There aren't too many things here. Twenty five at the most." She forced him to take the pile she held and smiled grimly. "I expect to see you at supper. Good day."

He watched her leave, making her way briskly across the school grounds and out of sight. "Humph! Damn parchments." He grumbled. I suppose now I'll have to go back to my rooms to drop these off. He thought angrily at the disruption of his day. Then an idea struck him. Maybe I'll pay a little visit to the Three Broomsticks. It's still early. That decided, he took off in the direction of the dungeons.

"Did you see how he treated us? Like some noble heirs." McGonagoll huffed.

"He was only flirting. Although it did get annoying at times."

"He was probably flirting with you, seeing as how you are much younger than I, Yukari."

The Astronomy teacher laughed. "Yes, but you are a _much _better dresser than I am. Honestly, look at these robes! I haven't gotten new ones in at least three years!"

"I haven't gotten new robes in forever! They are beginning to feel a bit tight around the middle now that I think about it."

"We should go shopping sometime." Professor Sinastra suggested, glancing longingly at a long black velvet cloak in a store window. "I hear Witchin' Willow has some hip new clothes. Like that enchanted dress I was looking at in their catalog; it has hidden pockets that can hold up to an endless amount of objects. It even has a special pocket to put one's wand when not in use with a built in repairing kit."

"I thought Witchin' Willow went out of business ages ago. No, never mind. That was Willow's Wand Shop."

"Willow's Wand Shop merged with another company. I don't remember what they're called now. Rumor has it they aren't very good and they sold over 300 cursed wands just last year." Yukari laughed suddenly. "Do you suppose that boy, Ronald Weasley accidentally came across one of their products?"

"Who knows? I think his wand was only damaged after being in used for so long."

"Maybe one of his brothers put a hex on it as a joke?"

"I wouldn't put it past them. Those two are a sneaky lot that can most certainly not be trust—"She was suddenly cut off by a gasp from her comrade. "What is it?" She stopped as well to see whatever it was that professor Sinastra was staring at, only to gasp as well.

"Minerva? Is that who I think it is, sitting at that bar in there?"

"I- I don't know, and I certainly hope it isn't." The man inside turned his head slightly and Minerva growled softly. "How _dare_ he?" She hissed. "Stay here while I go give him a piece of my mind! Wait until professor Dumbledore hears about this!" She stomped into the Three Broomsticks, a large scowl spreading across her face. "Severus Snape! You dare not be drinking!" As soon as she was behind him, she knew he was: the scent of alcohol seemed to drift off of him in waves, stinging her sinuses.

He looked up at her through a curtain of his greasy black hair, his eyes hazy, and let a grim smirk creep onto his pale face. "You." He slurred. "What are you doin' here? Have you come to give me somethin' better to do? Or to scold me an' mother me, treat'n me some child!?" When she was slow to answer, he raised his voice, demanding an answer as he wobbled unsteadily on the barstool. "huh?!!? What've yew got to say?"

"I think you have had quite enough to drink. Now stand up so we can get you back to you're rooms." She demanded.

"I dun wanna' go back." He said flatly, downing another glass of what Minerva could only guess was Odgen's Old Firewhiskey, from the bottle on the bar that was the closest to the man. "I'm not goin'ta go back there an' yew can't make me."

"Watch me." She replied, sliding out her wand from a pocket hidden in her sleeve and pointing it at him, threateningly. "I'm going to give you a choice, Severus. Either you come willingly back to Hogwarts with professor Sinastra and me, or I use some 'persuasion' methods that I know you won't like."

She waited a few moments to allow what she said to sink in to his brain. He blinked at her and frowned. "Why are you here again?"

There was almost an audible **snap** as her patience ran out. "Excuse me, sir," She said, waving down the bartender, who stopped and asked what she needed. "Can I just ask, how long has this man been here? And how much has he drank?"

"Hmmmm, let me see now. Ah, yes. He wandered in here around 4:30-ish and he's been here ever since." The man replied. He had an Australian accent. "Although I stopped serving him about an hour ago. Told him to go home, he was pretty drunk then and mumbling to himself. Scared off some of me customers I think. Are you a friend of his?"

"Yes, thank you. And I'm here to take him home." Sliding an arm around the younger man's torso, she gave a hefty heave, forcing him to stand up. She was stronger than she looked. Seeing from outside the window what Minerva was doing, the Astronomy instructor hustled in to help her and together they half-carried, half-dragged a drunken potions master outside into the fresh, crisp evening autumn air, sitting him down on a bench that happened to be not to far away.

"Whew! He may be a light-weight guy, but he's still heavy to me!" Sinastra complained, taking a seat next to him and grabbing a hold of his shoulders as to steady him so he didn't tumble over backwards.

"And I'm certainly not as young as I used to be." Minerva sighed. "Perhaps we should call for help? Remus is a rather sturdy man, maybe he could help us."

"Alright. I think I have a bit of extra floo powder somewhere," She fished in her pocket for a moment, then produced a small pouch and handed it to the older woman. "Here you go. It should be enough. I'll stay here with him."

"Where can I use the Floo network around here?"

"Try that candy store down at the end of that street." She pointed. "Its on the corner on your right hand side. Tell the lady at the counter with red hair you're a professor at Hogwarts and it's an emergency. She'll let you use the fireplace in the back room. Hurry." Professor McGonagoll hurried off as fast as she could go through the crowded streets of the wizarding town just as professor Snape began to doze off—or pass out, depending how one looked at it.

CHAPTER TWO: "Any way you look at it, you're screwed."

When Professor Snape woke up the next morning, the first thing he noticed besides his splitting headache was that he wasn't in his rooms. Sitting upright he winced, clutching his head in his hands, and glanced around through squinted eyes. His blindingly white surroundings told him he was in the hospital wing. Mumbling some cusses under his breath, he braved a look out the window to see that it was raining heavily. Such a lovely day. He thought sarcastically. If he wanted to get out of here without being scolded for his foolishness the evening before, he'd have to be slick- something he happened to be rather good at- and quick. Throwing the sheets back, he swept his gaze across the floor to find his shoes, which he spotted not too far away, at the foot of the bed. Setting his feet on the floor, he grabbed his boots and slipped them on, not bothering to tie them, and made for the door. He had only set his hand on the doorknob, when it began to turn, and not by him. "Crap!" He turned back to the bed, hoping he could dive back under the covers and feign sleep but the door had already opened to reveal Madame Pomfrey, her happy morning smile quickly fading into surprise as she saw him.

"Professor Snape! What on earth are you doing out of bed?"

"I thought it time I leave. I have classes to conduct, do I not?" He lied quickly. After all, his first class wasn't until ten o'clock, and it was obviously a few hours prior, seeing as how the sun was barely up.

"Whatever do you mean? There are no classes on Saturday, only detentions later in the evening."

"Well, whatever day it may be, I have more pressing matters than to be laying about the hospital wing all day." He snapped a bit more harshly than he had intended. He decided to counter it with a kind, but brisk "Good day." Before sweeping past her through the finely sculpted oak doorframe and out of the hospital wings, down the dimly lit corridor. Poppy stared after him in shock for a moment, then, springing back into life, she went after him, calling him back.

"Wait until Minerva hears about this! Get back here, you big old bat! For your own good, get back here or you'll regret it!! Severus!" She whipped out her wand, something she hardly ever used, and pointed it in his direction. "Immobilize!" She shouted, but missed, for he had slipped behind a statue of a fat sorcerer near the end of the hallway just in time. Unfortunately, the spell hit an unsuspecting third year with such force, it knocked her armful of books and papers into the air, where they froze, along with the student. "Oh, my. Sorry!" She quickly muttered the counterspell and ran to catch up with younger man. "If you don't stop this instant, I might just poison the next bunch of your precious Slytherins that enter my care!" Halting abruptly, he turned to face her.

"If you did that, you might find yourself suddenly unemployed. We cant have that, now can we?" He let a vicious smirk creep onto his pallid features, almost daring her to try something along the nature.

She strode up to him, stopping less than a foot away and puffed herself up angrily. "You get yourself back into the hospital wing this instant! You were left under my care with special orders not to allow you to leave until the headmaster himself gave me permission. Do you understand?"

He sneered at her. "I honestly don't care what the headmaster told you. I can't possibly stand another minute in that bleach-infested place! I can rest much easier in my own quarters thank you very much!" He hissed. _"Good day."_ With that, he stormed off.

"He _what_?" Minerva demanded when the nurse explained what happened. "He just walked out? Even after you explained it was Dumbledore's order that he stay?"

Poppy nodded. "I tried, I really did. But I just couldn't get him to go back the hospital wing. He seems edgier lately. Is there something wrong with him? Is it anything I might be able to help with?" Worry was etched into her face.

Minerva sighed. "I don't know. I've wondering the same thing myself, actually. I hope it's not anything serious.... But then again, everything with Severus is serious." She let out a bitter chuckle.

Down in the dungeons, Severus slammed the heavy door to his chambers, locked it and sat down heavily at his desk letting out a deep sigh. A few moments later he stood abruptly and strode over to a bookshelf on the far side of the room half hidden in shadows. Pulling out his wand from an inner pocket inside his robes, he muttered "Lumos," and began skimming the titles of the books; he found a rather thick old text and tugged it off the shelf and over to his desk with a bit of difficulty. Opening it, he skimmed down the table of contents with his finger until he came to rest on a line that read "Sleeping, numbing the mind, headaches and dreams: Chapter 53...... page 637". He began flipping through the yellowed pages until he found what he was looking for. Marking the page with his quill, he stood up again with the book and disappeared into another room that branched off of his sleeping quarters. Hopefully, this headache potion he was about to make, also worked on hangovers.

**Knock! Knock! **"Severus?" there was silence. "Severus??" He called, this time louder. He knocked again calling the other man. Once again he was met with silence. Rolling his eyes, Remus Lupin called through the door, "I know you're in there, Severus. Don't ask me how I know- I have my ways. Now answer the door, before I break it down." No one answered. He was about to unlock the door and enter using a useful spell when he heard familiar footsteps approaching. He turned to greet the elderly wizard. "Hello, Albus. What brings you down to the dungeons during such a lovely afternoon like this?"

"Hello, Remus. I need to speak with Severus. Is he here?"

"I'm pretty sure he is, but he's not answering. Do you think something may be wrong?" He asked with concern.

The headmaster stroked his long beard thoughtfully. "He's been acting rather, dare I say, foolishly as of late. I am quite concerned about him actually, and I wonder what could be making him act this way?"

"Maybe he's reading? He might have used an anti-sound spell so he could concentrate. I find myself doing that occasionally.... Do you think I should knock again?" Lupin turned back to the door before him.

Dumbledore stepped forward. "No, allow me to try." This time he rapped loudly with his knuckles. "Severus Snape, I order you to open this door this instant!" He bellowed. A moment passed and nothing happened.

"Well, that worked well." Lupin said jokingly.

With a dark look over his half-moon spectacles at the werewolf, the headmaster muttered a spell and the door swung open. With a triumphant "Ha" he entered. Lupin followed cautiously. The room was dark, not a single candle was lit, and an unearthly silence echoed eerily off the stone walls. Dumbledore threw some light into the fireplace on the other side of the room where a fire roared into life upon impact, the shadows danced in the corners and on the low ceiling. Both men glanced around the room for any other signs of life. Remus was the first to spot the dark bundle on the bed and went to investigate. Resting his hand on top of him, he let out a sigh of relief. "He's asleep." He announced softly. Dumbledore came to stand beside him and nodded. Sitting on the bed, he shook the man's shoulder.

"Severus?" He said. The potions master was curled up amidst the dark sheets and blankets of his bed, his thick traveling cloak wrapped about him, his knees drawn up to his chest. The elderly wizard pushed his shoulder and turned him onto his back. Laying a hand on Snape's brow, he frowned, the turned to Remus. "This sleep is not natural. He is not well. Go fetch Madame Pomfrey. Quickly now."

"Y-yes, sir." And he dashed from the room, his patched robes billowing behind.

Albus stood, lighting the few candles and lamps around the room, and took a seat on the edge of the bed once more. Grabbing the blanket at the foot of the bed, he draped it over the darkly clad man and tucked it tightly around him. He felt his forehead again. He was warm. A few minutes later, Lupin thundered into the room, the nurse trailing behind with some difficulty as she shifted a white bag under her arm. "Ah! Poppy."

"Whatever's the matter, Albus? Remus didn't give me any details." She seemed out of breath as she neared the bed.

Albus stood and moved to the side to allow the nurse to see the patient. "He's very warm. It would seem that he took some sort of potion as well." He gestured to the empty bottle on the bedside table. "I can't seem to wake him either."

Poppy moved closer and stood over her patient and frowned. "I told him to stay in the hospital wing! And he didn't listen! Humph! Serves him right."

"Actually, that's what I wanted to discuss with him when we found him." Dumbledore said.

"I believe he said something yesterday about how he hasn't been sleeping too well." Lupin said, hoping to be of some help. "Do you think he might've taken a potion to help him sleep better?"

"Perhaps. He could have taken a potion for anything. Knowing him, he probably poisoned himself."

"Madame! That's not a very nice thing to say! Besides, we're trying to be optimistic right now." Remus scolded.

She blinked at him innocently over her shoulder. "We are? Well in that case, he'll probably die as well. It might do him some good. If we're lucky, he will be reborn as an obedient child who does what he is told." A glare from the headmaster told her to get to work. After a moment of two of examination of the man she finally sank into a chair. "A few days' rest should be good. I do not believe he took a sleeping potion. It smells like a cure for a headache. Probably for his hangover, if you ask me. He is most likely just stressed."

Lupin started to speak but Dumbledore beat him to it. "So he will need someone to fill in for him during classes for how long, would you say? A week or two should be good, shouldn't it?"

"Yes, that should suffice. And guessing from his current behaviour, I'd say there is more going on than just physical stress, Albus. You should speak to him, or send him to see someone."

"Yes. I know. I've noticed too."

"I should get back to the hospital wing now. Some student probably fell down a flight of stairs and is in need of mending, or something like that. These students honestly don't know how to keep themselves out of trouble for two minutes!"

Albus chuckled. "Ah, but we love them anyways."

"Or at least we pretend to." She shot sarcastically. "Now someone should probably stay with him for a while. At least until tomorrow or when he feels up to moving around a bit. He'll probably be hungry when he wakes up; I haven't seen him eat a bite in days. I'll leave you two to decide who shall stay with him. As for me I'm off. Have a lovely rest of the day." With that, she gave a small bow and left.

Lupin turned to the headmaster. "Who do you recon should stay with him?"

"Well it can't possibly be me, seeing as I have some meetings today and a great deal of paperwork waiting for me in my office that I've been putting off for days. And Minerva will no doubt be busy."

"We could ask Sybil, maybe. She's never busy." Remus suggested.

"Hmmm, bad idea I think. I hate to say it, but I don't believe that anyone would want to wake up to her. She's a bit much for Severus as it is."

"True. How about Ismene Hooch?"

"They don't get along at all."

"Yukari Sinastra?"

"They'd kill each other. Besides, you know as well as I that Yukari would never agree. She'd say it's his own fault for ending up like this and then storm away."

"Filch seems to get off quite well with him. No, never mind, he's busy keeping the school safe."

"Aha!" The older man lets out so suddenly it made Remus jump. "I've got a perfect idea!"

"Don't scare me like that, Albus. You nearly gave me a heart attack!"

"Why don't you stay with him?"

"Uh, Well what about my classes?" The werewolf asked.

"I could find someone to cover for you. Minerva would be delighted, I think. I always thought she had a secret longing for teaching Defense Against the Dark Arts."

"Alright then. I'll stay. But I'm not so sure Severus will take to kindly to the idea."

"Good. Now if you don't mind, I have a meeting in less than ten minutes, and I'd best not be late. Good day!"

A/N: hahaha! So, how was the first chappie? Send me ur reviews please!! This is my first posted fanfiction on this site so please bear with me. It's not my fault if the spacing comes out funny either, so blame technology not me.

REVIEW!!!! (Flames will be accepted).

Thanks.

SoraX


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